As a parent, we might have heard our child come home and talk about mean kids at school. We might also have seen the movies portraying their tactics, and how they gain popularity by bullying others. We don’t want our kids to feel scared or intimidated by these kids. We want to help them take back their power and feel confident in their own skin.
Parents should teach kids that bullying in any form is not acceptable, and they have a right to speak up about it. Train them to be assertive when dealing with mean kids, and to use body language that conveys confidence. Make it clear that it’s not okay for anyone to push them around, be abusive, or use hurtful language toward them. When they know how to take a stand, they’ll be less likely to become the target of mean girls.
Teach them to be resilient. When kids are resilient, they have the mental toughness to bounce back from difficult situations. Tell them that it’s okay to make mistakes and that they can always try and learn from them. Ensure that they have the necessary skills to cope with stress, as this will enable them to better handle mean kids. Encourage them to pursue activities they enjoy, which they’ll find rewarding, and allow them to develop a sense of identity and purpose. Also, encourage them to seek professional help if they are being bullied.
So, why are mean kids popular?
Mean kids are popular because they have a social hierarchy. This means that they have a group of friends that they hang out with and they are at the top of the social ladder. However, this social hierarchy can be really dangerous. If you are not part of their group, you can become a target for their bullying. They may exclude other kids or spread rumors about them just because they are not part of their clique.
Mean kids also want to feel in Control. They may feel powerless in some areas of their life, such as at home or in their academics. So, they try to assert their power over others to compensate. They may do this by being bossy, manipulative, or even violent. This can be really scary and harmful for those around them. Kids can break the mean kid cycle, by being assertive, being kind to others that get excluded, and being resilient by reaching out to resources or support when they need it.
How can kids take back their power?
- Be Assertive & Stand Up for Yourself. If a mean kid is bothering you, don’t be afraid to tell them to stop. Use confident body language and assertive speech to show her that you mean business. Also, surround yourself with positive friends who lift you up instead of tearing you down.
- Be Kind and Inclusive to Others. If you see someone being bullied or excluded, speak up and offer to help. Be an upstander—not a bystander. An upstander stands up to bullies and a bystander stands by and watches. Invite them to sit with you at lunch or play with you at recess. Show them that they are valued and appreciated. By spreading kindness and inclusion, you can create a positive school culture that doesn’t tolerate bullying or meanness.
- Be Resilient By Reporting Bullying. Sometimes standing up for yourself isn’t enough, especially if the bullying is severe or violent. In this case, it’s important to report the bullying to adults. This can be your parents, teacher, or principal. They can help you address the problem and protect you from further harm. You can also report the bullying of your peers that are getting victimized. Remember: bullying is never okay, and everyone has the right to feel safe and respected at school.
Mean kids are popular because they have a social hierarchy and want to feel in control. But kids can take back that power by standing up for themselves, reporting bullying to adults, and being kind and inclusive. Remember, you deserve to feel safe and respected at school. Don’t let mean kids take that away from you. With a little confidence and support, kids can overcome their meanness and create a positive school environment for everyone.