Did you know that popular students in school can often be the most aggressive? Let’s learn more about why mean girls are perceived as popular by their peers and what parents can do to address this issue.
It’s surprising how the most popular students can also be the most aggressive. These students are known as popular-aggressive children.
Popular-aggressive children exhibit behaviors that are highly desired by peers. They are athletic, attractive, and charismatic. They often show arrogance and entitlement. Imagine a cheerleading squad led by a popular girl, while her followers copy everything she does. Her leadership role and their willingness to conform are what make her influential.
First, mean girls often use social manipulation to gain popularity while maintaining social control over their peers.
Secondly, aggression is a way that these popular children establish power and influence. They use aggressive behavior towards their peers to control them, and since their classmates admire and look up to them, they don’t challenge their aggressive behavior. An important distinction for parents to help their children understand is that these kids are often not popular because they are well-liked, but actually because kids are scared of them.
They are popular because kids are perceiving them to be and they are giving them that power.
Bullies are often treated better than their victims, which is why they continue to bully. It’s essential for parents to understand that aggression is not only physical but can also be emotional manipulation or verbal abuse.
Thirdly, according to research, adolescents high in perceived popularity have an increased risk of engaging in risky behaviors such as alcohol use, smoking, and sexual activity. These popular adolescents will often feel more empowered to act out or engage in risky behavior, precisely because they believe they will not face any significant consequences. Parents who use the permissive style of parenting often raise children who are popular-aggressive. Parents must be aware of how their own parenting style impacts their children. They should also be aware of their child’s social circle and the behavior they are exhibiting in that group to reduce the likelihood of such behaviors.
Fourthly, mean girls are often popular because they are fulfilling their own need for control, and as a result, their behavior can stem from the lack of a healthy emotional expression. Such children may demonstrate characteristics of being fragile inside and can be operating from a place of fear. It’s important for parents to understand the motivations behind their children’s behavior, so they can recognize the signs and help their children cope better.
Mean girls are popular due to their ability to manipulate and control their peers, which is often because of their perceived athleticism, attractiveness, and coolness. Parents must pay attention to changes in their children’s moods, behavior, or friend group dynamics, as it could indicate bullying, aggression, or risk-taking behavior in their children.
It’s essential for parents to help their children with healthy coping mechanisms to manage their emotions better and provide them with appropriate tools to respond to peer pressure. Parents must encourage their children to build strong relationships built on mutual respect and kindness, which will help them lead to having meaningful relationships in their lives and fulfilling lives as adults.